On the surface, you will probably meet hundreds of people like me. Nerdy, love computers, enjoy solving problems that other people avoid. But venture past that with me for a moment.
All my life I have done everything to fit in, with a few moments of rebellion. Conform to survive, that is the game we play. I desired to win, no matter the cost.
I am not a material person. I love my wife and my dog, and I love to do things. The action of it, the experience of it, whatever it is. There is one experience that brings me a special kind of joy: the act of fixing something for someone.
I believe every thing wants to work and every person wants the things they use to work. The moment of frustration when something breaks, but I am able to help, is special. The whole world disappears and it is just the three of us: the person, the thing, and me. Listening to the person and the thing, remembering what being stuck was like, and knowing when to ask for help is how we find the problem.
Fitting in is a distraction at best. To fit in, we have to lose ourselves. And we lose our ability to see the problems that need fixing. For a long time, I lost touch with myself. A proud Japanese American, who can’t spend another minute trying to conform to their assigned gender.
If I am going to help others fix the problems they may not be able to fix, I need to be able to see the problem. If I am not me, I cannot see. I hope to be around others who are finding themselves again and seeing the world anew.